I never pay much attention to my own journal entries, 'cause I doubt, that anybody's reading it at all and I just don't know what I can share with the few people who actually do ^^

So I'll simply try to write a few lines about what photography means to me which is a hell lot of

All my life I have been suffering from an attention deficit disorder, which affected very bad school results. Although I worked really hard, my marks only became worse. I seemed to dissapoint everyone I cared about, even myself and became very depressed as a teenager. I didn't even have any real friends at school, the most people just ignored, or bullied me.

Despite all the difficulties I finally passed my A-level exams and began to study in Bavaria to become a teacher for disabled children.

At university I was as well very shy, picked the wrong people as friends and hardly passed my exams at the end of every semester. At the same time I began to experiment with my first own digital camera. A Kodak Easyshare (sooo crappy )

To date, so much has changed in my life. I've got new friends, who are always there when I need them. Also I'm in therapy where I'm learning how to organize myself and study properly. I take a lot of meds, which help me very much. I don't have to cry every night anymore, what a relief

Whenever I feel depressed or imbalanced I grab my Canon and crawl through the meadows, chase insects and other animals. If others enjoy the pictures I take, may it be here on DA, in my family, or circle of friends, I get the feeling that at least this is something I'm good at, which makes me more self-confident. Photograpy is something I can finally concentrate on, that makes my heart jump at every beat and turns my face totally red, 'cause every time I press the shutter I forget to breathe
Even if I'm not very popular here I'm overwhelmed by all the support I got on this platform. I'm so glad about every single person who likes one of my pictures and so impressed by all the beauty other great photographers here are able to catch. I hope that in the future I can still arouse happiness, sadness and other emotions with my work. Wish me luck

So long, Sindy.

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